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What exactly do second generation Chinese leaders want from their fellow leaders in first gen Chinese ministries?

A while ago I posted on the dynamics of majority culture and minority culture (here) – which highlights how the majority culture are not necessarily conscious of how the minority culture perceives them, and how easily the work of the minority culture can be misunderstood and undermined.

Here is the five manifesto that we drafted several years ago. These five points summarise what first generation leaders must do in order to allow second generation ministries to flourish. In many ways this is the companion piece to that earlier post, highlighting what can be done by the leadership of the majority culture.

While it is written with Chinese culture in mind, we believe it is equally applicable for other second gen cultures. It addresses the nature of the partnership, the nature of unity, and the important leadership role first gen leadership have.

1. Give second generation ministries the freedom to direct their own mission.

Second generation Chinese culture is different from first generation Chinese culture. The things that work well for reaching the first generation may in fact work terribly for reaching and growing the second generation.

Allow second generation ministries to develop their own ministry philosophy, and do not impose a different ministry philosophy.

2. Pursue gospel unity and not organisational unity.

Do not pursue the organisational unity of big church camps and combined church events, since these actually undermine the effectiveness of second generation ministries.

What we want is true gospel unity- which involves different congregations supporting each other generously (in prayer, resources, finances, forgiveness) in their individual pursuit of their own mission.

3. Support their ministry in your own preaching and teaching.

Often families are spread across different congregations – and we do not have the ability to challenge aspects of their family’s culture. However as leaders of first generation ministries you have the most access and influence over the parents and other leaders. Use that capital to address issues that affect our ministry.

And so speak to your second generation colleagues about what issues they are noticing. And in your preaching and ministry challenge the idolatry of study and success. Challenge parents to be involved in the spiritual upbringing of their children. And encourage parents to see full time ministry and missions work as desirable paths for their children.

4. Foster a ministry environment that second generation congregation leaders can understand and genuinely participate in.

Second generation congregation leaders care about their church and want to participate. However this is often difficult in practice. On paper the constitution says one thing, but in practice things operate in a completely different way. This makes it difficult for second generation members to understand and navigate, and they become frustrated when their attempts to bring issues into the open are seen with hostility and denials. When ministry suggestions are denied or ministries damaged because some leader needed to gain face.

And so second generation ministries need champions who are able to make space for them in the unwritten church polity, and preferably to call others to follow the written church polity, so they can be fully involved members of their church.

5. Teach your congregation to think like missionaries.

We have been telling second generation congregation leaders that they must think and act like missionaries when relating with the first generation Chinese, realising they are in a bi-cultural situation.

However we also need people in first generation Chinese congregations to not be culture blind, to realise they are relating to people who are genuinely of another culture, and to themselves think and act like missionaries towards the second generation congregation. This is a culture shift that requires them to be trained, coached and reminded.

1. Something much less than hatred

I’ve noticed a few things about sins.

Instead of hating sin, we tend to do a number of strange things towards sin. I’ve noticed that sometimes:

• We defend it, encourage others in it, justify it.
• We enjoy it and are entertained by it.
• We harbour it quietly, knowing that it is sin.
• We long to get involved in it, and secretly wish we weren’t Christians so that we could.

And so often when it comes to sin there is a theoretical, intellectual commitment that yes, sin is bad – but there is no strength of hatred of sin from our affections. That is because for us our opposition to sin is only at the intellectual level – but not at the level of the heart. And instead our easy acquaintance with sin reveals hearts that do not love God – and which instead loves what those sins do for us…

2. When hatred of sin dishonours God

There are some cases where we do find certain sins outrageous and distressing – and not others. And sometimes these cases can reveal the true idols of our heart. Because we are outraged when someone sins against those things that we truly cherish.

Take the example of when someone’s personal freedoms are infringed upon – and they get irate. It is because their idol is themselves, and someone has dared to undermine their selfhood. Or take the example of someone who loves money – and who therefore finds theft, fraud, embezzelment particularly affronting.

This means that when people are outraged by certain sinful acts, God may not be necessarily pleased with their outrage. This is because it stems, not from a love for him, but a love for something else. And so it is actually an extension of idolatry.

This makes no sense for those who only hold a simple view of sin, thinking that sin is merely certain acts. Because who cares what the motivation for someone’s hatred for stealing comes from! However truly God-honouring hatred for sin stems from a love for God.

In his Confessions, Augustine wrote that: “he loves Thee too little who loves anything together with Thee which He loves not for Thy sake.” By this he meant that our love for something (even something good) is idolatrous if it does not flow from a love for God.

However the opposite is also true: our hatred for something (even something bad) is idolatrous if does not flow from a jealousy for God!

3. How to properly hate sin

This then is how we grow hot in our hated for sin. It is by growing correspondingly hotter in our love for God. And as a result, things which we see offend against the honour and name of the God we love, become outrageous to us.

It is like a husband who loves his wife. Those who dishonour her, he hates – because he loves his wife. His hatred is a direct consequence of his love. The stronger his love, the stronger the hatred.

However if we find a man who claims to love his wife, yet does not show any hate those who dishonour her – well, you would want to question his love for her.

But now take the example of  a husband whose wife is dishonured – and yes, this time the husband is outraged! But it is not on account of her honour that he is outraged – instead, he is outraged because her sobbing inconveniences him. or because he doesn’t like having to hear such nasty words in his presence. or because it is against a higher principle of justice to which he holds. Such outrage may be directed at the same act - but it does not stem from the right source, and therefore does not honour his wife.

As you grow in your love for God, and as you grow to see how certain sins offend against the majesty and honour of God, then you will find yourself developing a properly God-honouring – and strong – hated for that sin. And this will be true whether you find those sins in yourself – or in others.

In our part of Sydney quite a lot of Chinese Christians study at university.

And in our part of Sydney there is quite a good university with a good range of courses. It’s very close by, and has good transport links. And not only that, there are many mainland Chinese students at this university, making it an excellent choice for the purposes of befriending and sharing Jesus with fellow students.

However over the years as I have gotten to know Christians in this region, I’ve noticed that the university that Chinese Christians tend to go to is actually quite far away from where they live. Instead of studying close by, there is a strange trend that involves studying at a much further university. One that involves spending hours on public transport travelling across Sydney. Every day, for several years.

And yes, they do get a good education there, but it is strange, given that there is a pretty good university just near by, with great opportunities for connecting friends with their church’s ministry. Why is that?

I wonder if, for many, the thinking is that a university degree from that university will mean a better job, and therefore a higher paying job. And in hope of that extra edge, many will spend long hours travelling across Sydney. In the mean time forgoing the opportunity to make connections with students living quite close by to them.

When I was choosing my university, I know that inside of me there was this strong, burning desire to reach the very furthest I could with the marks I got from school. To get into the very best uni I could, no matter what it took. No matter what it meant in terms of travel. I felt compelled to stretch and secure the best opportunities, and work out the details later.

But of course if I was asked why I chose that university, I would have said that it was a good university. That I want to get a good education. That I want to be challenged. I suppose it convinced others – it was a good cloak. A useful subterfuge.

Of course, there is nothing wrong as such with going to one university or another. But what I want to highlight is how the inclinations of one’s heart may cause people to go to quite extreme lengths in the pursuit of their treasure. It is said, “What the heart desires, the will chooses, and the mind justifies.” And you can see how that dynamic comes into play, even in this simple choice of university.

Is the difference in education really so massive that we travel across Sydney for several years? Is the imagined difference in starting salary really so significant to us that we give up opportunities to befriend and minister to students living close by? Because it does have an impact on the kind of ministry we can do. On the time we have to invest in relationships. Even on our sleep!

The truth about universities is that it doesn’t really matter all that much what university you go to. We believe that it matters, and so choose accordingly – but in reality, employers aren’t all that fussed. They are really much more interested in the quality of the person than the crest on the testamur. So we needn’t worry so much.

Of course there may be great reasons for choosing a far-away university. Just as they may be bad reasons for choosing a close-by university. But what we are concerned about here in either case is what it is that our heart desires above all.

If you are already plugged in at a far-away university and feel convicted, it may be wiser to stay there and grow the relationships that you have already built. But learn now, how the desires of our heart so easily influence our choices. Observe how the desire for wealth or prestige leads to a multitude of seemingly innocent choices. And remember that sin is not primarily bad actions – but hearts that love and serve and worship a lesser god.

Have you been growing lately as a Christian, I wonder?

Or has your growth stalled for the last few years?

Many Christians that I meet find that, after many years of being a Christian, often serving quite faithfully in many of those years, they find that they have somehow stopped growing. There is no sense of direction or movement or excitement any more in their Christian life. There is no firey zeal as there once was. And instead there is only the average, unexciting existence as a Christian. And so they look back with wistful longing, perhaps with doubt, on their earlier years as a firey Christian.

Or was their past Christian experience really all that great..?

Today I want to suggest that in many cases, they may only have had the appearance of growth all along.

Because when one first becomes a Christian – there is a lot to learn. And so yes, the early years of their Christian life are filled with the joy and the excitement and exhilaration of discovering all the wonderful things in the Bible. And arguing through huge issues such as the sovereignty of God with their friends. Discovering the depth of thought that has gone into the doctrine of the Trinity. Perhaps wrestling with origins of evil. And certainly, seeing the breathtaking clarity of the gospel over against the worldview around them.

And so yes there is a lot of growth – in information – in those early years.

But then some people also get involved in Christian ministry. And begin serving in the Sunday School, or as Bible study leaders. Or perhaps by doing evangelism among their friends. And once they start that, they discover again that there is so much to learn: how to write Bible studies. How to handle the Old Testament properly. How to tell the gospel to someone. How to answer tricky questions. How to use the photocopier and organise a team and run a camp and give a talk and choose leaders. And that whole adventure of ministry – and learning the skills of ministry – is very exciting. Suddenly they see how they can play a part in encouraging others, leading another person to Christ, even being part of the leadership team.

And so yes, again there is a lot of growth – in skills – that comes after those early years.

And I suppose that after a while, people could find themselves advancing even further in learning, opening up greater heights of theological study. No longer are they learning words like: Trinity, eschatology, perspicuity. Now they are learning to use words like: Tridentine, proleptic, perichoresis!

And in terms of skills, one could similarly push oneself to recapture that sense of growth, that sense of movement as a Christian, by learning the arcane skills of preaching, or the politics of being on a church committee.

However far they go, inevitably, most of these Christians will get the sense that things are not quite right. They will get the sense that things have plataeued off. And they no longer have the sense of growth and progress in the Christian life that they once had.

I want to say that for many of these Christians the problem is that for many years they have only had the false appearance of growth. They thought they were growing all those years – but really, that was only the excitement of learning about theology. And for some, the learning of ministry skills.

Growth in information – yes. Growth in skills – sure.

But not true growth as a Christian.

Because true growth as a Christian is growing to love God more. And growing to fear him more. Longing for his return more. Growing to hate sin more. Growing more zealous to do good works… this is true growth as a Christian!

Realistically, there is only so much you can learn in terms of information, or in terms of skill. And after that…what? But in terms of our love for God, our fear of him – this what we are created to grow in, for the rest of our lives, and on into eternity as, with new eyes, we behold his unveiled glory.

And so for many Christians, they may have thought they were growing as a Christian – when in fact for many years they had substituted true growth, for growth merely in information. Or in skills.

In fact I have met people who have progressed so far and so high in Christian leadership and ministry that they are now one of the key leaders at their church. They are respected leaders. But when you ask them careful questions – you may discover that they know nothing about the love of God. They do not fear him. And, despite all they have attained – their position, their respect, their qualifications even – you wonder if they really are Christians in the first place.

And so, if you wonder why you’ve stopped growing. Perhaps you might want to consider whether you have really grown at all in the things that really matter.

Or whether, for all these years, your growth has only ever been in information. And skills.

Last week I shared with you a parable of sorts. A story of five office workers who are going about their normal working day in a mid-sized firm (see previous post). And today I want to make eight observations about that snapshot…

1. Not an exhaustive list

We saw that each one of those workers magnified something in their work. But the first thing to note is that this was not meant to be an exhaustive list. Yes, among those five workers we had examples of men and women magnifying leisure, career, money, a job well done, and helping people. But these are only five examples, and there are many more things that people can magnify in their work. Such as: overseas holidays. personal usefulness. pleasing parents. having a nice lifestyle. The list could go on and on…

2. Not just for the office worker

Not only that, you need to know that this also holds true for those who don’t work in an office building. You might be a student, or a stay-at-home mum. Yet the same thing will still hold true: you will also be magnifying something in what you do.

Take the example of the stay at home mum. She is trying to read her book, but the kids make so much noise all the time, and so she is angry because she can never have a moment to even finish a page. She is angry because there are so many things to do which take up her time, and she cannot read her book. The only part of her day that she enjoys is at night when the kids are asleep and she can turn her attention to her book at last. For this stay at home mum what she magnifies is the reading of her book. That for her, is her greatest love.

Whatever people love in their heart, or what they fear in their heart, that is what they magnify in greater or lesser degree.

3. Degrees of intensity

And I say greater or lesser degree because the more intensely someone loves leisure, or career, or wealth. The more intensely someone craves the approval of their parents, then to that extent will more and more of their actions align themselves in the direction of the thing they love or fear.

That’s because people are generally polite and so they won’t do extreme things. Winnie might love money, but she is unlikely to go to the extent of stealing money from her company. Raymond might treasure a job well done, but he is unlikely to shoot dead a user who is overloading his network. They won’t do that.

But you will still notice things that give you an indication about the intensity of their love. What things they sacrifice without a moment’s hesitation. Observe carefully, listen carefully – and you can see what it is that people love (or fear), and what they therefore magnify.

4. No one overthinks

The important thing to notice about those five office workers is how they have probably given very little thought to how their love for “a job well done”, translates to how they function at work. They often don’t give it any thought at all – it just happens. Mitchell doesn’t consciously stop and consider consider: “Oh wait a minute. I’m about to go into a meeting, and what I love most of all is my career. Now how should I talk in this meeting..?” Nor does Tim think to himself: “Hang on. Now I am meant to love leisure. What should this mean for when I should go back from my lunch break?” No: for Tim and Mitchell, and Winnie and Raymond, and Tony, it just comes naturally.

And it’s the same thing with us. It’s a little artificial for us to work out: “oh wait, I want to magnify God, that is what I love most of all. Now what does that mean for how I write this document?”

Because that would come across weird and fake looking. It’s as if we asked Tim, who really loves his leisure most of all, to behave as though he loved his career most of all.

“What would I have to do?” Tim would ask you, because he doesn’t really know what you mean. And so you tell him that he needs to stay at work long into the night, do more work than he is paid for, learn the names of all the partners, and wear a tie.

And so, for a week, Tim tries. It is unnatural for him, but he really gives it a go. But what you will find is that he just won’t have it in him. As he sits in his mail room long into the night, wearing a tie, he sighs to himself. And dreams of what he will do on the weekend. Because his heart really is elsewhere.

5. How to change your affections

How does Tim in the mailroom become like Mitchell up in the corner office? Just by doing the things that Mitchell does? No. A transformation needs to happen, a change on the inside, a change at the level of his heart. That is what needs to happen for him to truly stop magnifying leisure, and begin magnifying career. A change at the level of the heart, not merely at the level of behaviours. But once Tim’s heart is captivated by career, then will his behaviours change.

6. Why there is not much detail

And so for you to glorify God in your work, the very first step is not actually to consider what things you need to fix up at work. Instead it is to grow in your love for God. To intensify that. To feed that fire inside of you so that it is strong and fierce and hot. And that will lead to lives that naturally glorify God.

Have you wondered why it is that the Bible doesn’t feel the need to outline in great detail the things you must do? It’s because that is not the way to do it. Yes it mentions a few things here and there: we are told to work diligently even when our boss is not watching us all the time, it tells us to pay wages fairly, to not be harsh with people, not to steal from those we work for – but there’s not a complete itemised breakdown of what you should do in every instance.

And that’s because the way we glorify God in our vocation is not in the first instance by applying ourselves to those externals – but to grow strong and hot and fierce in our love for God. And from there, everything flows.

7. Even doing a good job is wrong

As you worked your way through the building you might have thought to yourself: “I can see how leisure is a bad thing to glorify. I can see what you’re getting at with money and also with career. But isn’t it good to pursue a job well done, like Raymond in IT? And surely it must be good to help people. Surely at least Tony from Sales is what we should be aiming at. Are you saying to me that Tony is wrong?”

Yes. Even Tony here is wrong. I know that he is doing good deeds. I know he is good and helpful and not selfish. But even Tony from Sales is wrong.

You may find this shocking. And confused how this could be the case.

But God is not pleased merely with the doing of good things. Because God’s ultimate design for you is not for you to do good things to people. Instead, it is for you to glorify him.

Many non Christians do good things. Genuinely good things. Many non Christians are generous and thoughtful and kind. But lived with no thought of honouring and loving the God who gives them life. And God is not pleased by what he sees (Romans 8:5-8).

8. Christians behaving badly

All of this means that you might be a regular church goer. Perhaps even a leader at your church.

But at work. In your vocation. It is very clear what it is that you really glorify. It is very clear what it is that you hold to be most precious, to be most valuable – and it is not the Lord Jesus.

Oh yes, you attend this church on a Sunday. But in your workplace, you are the one whose life magnifies a job well done. You are the one whose life magnifies career advancement. People notice how your eyes only ever light up when you talk about overseas holidays. People are afraid that you will bite their heads off if they overload the server.

What is it that you magnify? What are you showing people to be your greatest treasure? Is it the Lord Jesus Christ?

How do we glorify God? It is when we see the glory of God, and we reflect that back to him in loving him. In our adoration and awe and worship. And we are to do this in all of our life – not just at church, but in our everyday vocation as well. Piper writes that,

The aim of life is the same, whether in a secular vocation or in a church or mission vocation. Our aim is to joyfully magnify Christ – to make him look great by all we do.

John Piper, Don’t Waste Your Life, 135.

In our last post we looked at some popular ways in which people suggest that God might be glorified in our vocation (see previous post).

Well today I want to suggest to you that everyone magnifies something in their work. They may not know that they are doing it, they may not have given it much thought. But if you look closely enough and are sensitive to the nuances of how this person works – how they talk when they are at work. the mood they have when their boss is out of hearing. how they handle a smaller-than-CPI pay increase. how they handle losing business to a competitor.

If you look closely at all these things, you will see that everyone magnifies something. And it comes out very naturally in the way they work.

Let me illustrate this for you.

Picture a medium sized office building. And we enter the office building from the rear entrance. And we go in, and here is the mail room. And here is Tim, leaning against the counter. There’s nothing much to do. At every opportunity he has he’s listening to his music and thinking about what he will do on the weekend. When someone calls him, he slowly pushes himself off the counter and shuffles off. The only time that Tim moves quickly is when it’s 5pm when he closes up the mail room, grabs his coat, and rushes out the door. In his work, Tim magnifies something. Tim shows to everyone that what is most valuable to him, what is of immense worth to him is actually his leisure. And that shapes everything he says and does when he is at work.

From the mail room we go upstairs to a corner office on the top floor. And here is Mitchell, at his desk, juggling two calls. He is intense! He is driven! And he will be here late into the night when almost everyone else has gone for the day! He is very good at his job – and he works much harder than his pay demands. He’s been here for two and a half years, but he has shot up like a rocket. All of the partners in this firm know him – and for his own part, he’s been careful to learn their names and greet them in the elevators. And Mitchell knows that if he keeps on impressing, then by the end of the year he might be the youngest partner in the history of the firm. Mitchell also magnifies something in his work. Look carefully and you can see that what is most valuable to Mitchell is his career. And that shapes everything he says and does.

From that corner office we move down to Winnie in accounting. She doesn’t really like her job. She can do it, don’t get me wrong. But she really only took this job because it pays well. This office is actually quite a drive from where she lives. And yet every morning she turns up and crunches the numbers, with half an eye on better job openings on the careers website. Winnie has a long night ahead of her – because she’s also doing her CA, which means more travel, longer nights, more assignments – but it also means more money once she finishes her last subject. Winnie also magnifies something in her work. It doesn’t take long to see that for Winnie money is everything. And that shapes everything she says and does.

From accounting we go up and across to Raymond in IT. And this guy is good at his job. Yes, he’s a little bit prickly, but that’s because he really wants to make sure the system is as good as it can be. And so he gets a bit short sometimes with users who don’t know what they are doing. With people who forget their passwords, or who overload the server, who use unapproved software and muck around with the network cabling. A lot of things tick this guy off, but he is so good at his job, so dedicated, that they put up with him. Quite often he skips lunch and works late because there are problems he has to fix around the place. Raymond also magnifies something in his work. For him, it’s a job well done. That is what’s important to him. And that shapes everything he says and does.

From IT we go down to sales, where Tony is about to dash out of the office. Tony really loves his job. He gets to go out there and meet new people. And today he’s going to meet some prospective clients. Everyone loves Tony: he always remembers your name, he always has a smile and a joke. And what he does is he talks to people about how this firm can add value to their business. And he’s not just blowing smoke – he really believes that he can help them. And that really gives him a buzz. Tony also magnifies something in his work. For Tony, what’s most important is people. He loves to help them, and do good for them. That’s what’s most important to him. And it shapes everything that Tony says and does.

And so you can see that if you look carefully enough, everyone magnifies something in their work.

The significance of this? We’ll see in our next post… :)

We know that we’ve been created for the glory of God – but how does that actually come about?

I recently had the opportunity to do some talks for a camp (Grace CCC), which made me do some thinking about how God is glorified in our day to day life. Especially during all the hours we spend at work, or doing housework, or studying – all those hours doing non churchy things.

This is an important issue because it goes right to the heart of our created purpose – but surprisingly, many people have answers that are not very well thought out.

Today I want to share a number of ways in which people might suggest to you that God is glorified. You’ve probably heard some of them. You may even believe some of them – but I think these are all ultimately wrong…

Doing your best

Quite a few people may have suggested to you that it is by excelling in all our work that God is glorified. It is by being the very best that we can. If you are a baker then by baking the best bread that you can. If you are a student by getting the best mark that you can. If you are an employee, it is by working your hardest. And somehow that is meant to glorify God.

Being the best

A variation on that is to say that it is when we are the very best, when we reach the top that God is glorified (not just when we try our best). And so it is when I become the youngest partner in the law firm. or when I top my school in maths. or when my team wins the soccer game – that is when God is glorified.

Doing good to others

Another approach is to identify when it is in your work that you are doing good to others – and then put your focus on that. So if you are a baker, then you focus on how the bread you make feeds families. If you are an accountant, then it’s how you are helping your clients sort out their affairs. The thinking here is that it’s in the doing good that is  glorifying to God.

Abandoning the devices of the flesh

Others will tell you that God is glorified when you abandon the devices of the flesh and rely entirely on the spirit. This relies on the teaching Watchman Nee, and the idea here is that when you make your daily decisions by spirit-infused intuition and not by using human reason, not by using skills and methods that you might have learnt, God is glorified. When you are relying on God in that ‘spiritual’ kind of way, that is when you glorify God.

Evangelism

Here people will say that it is when we are sharing the gospel with someone, that God is glorified. It’s not really through your work at all. Work merely provides the opportunity for you to meet people in order to evangelise. And so God is glorified when people pause from their work of being a baker or a mother to hear the gospel.

Abandon secular work

And a variation of the one above is to say that secular work is of no real value. And so it’s actually by abandoning secular work and doing full time ministry or missions work that you can really start to glorify God.

There are two versions to this: one that elevates ministers and missionaries to a higher spiritual state. And another that says that this world is passing away and so anything to do with this world is wasted, so we should only give ourselves to work that will last into the future world.

The problem with the first few is that you can actually perform objectively ‘good’ actions – and have your heart in completely the wrong place. You could excel in business – like the rich fool of Luke 12 – and yet be found at the end to not have been rich towards God. You could pray – like those who ask God for things in James 4:3 – but who do so with false motives. You could do good ever since you were a child – be like the rich young ruler in Luke 18 – and still love wealth.

And so doing one’s best, being the best, and even doing good is not necessarily glorifying to God. In fact all these things could be done with hearts that do not love God – but instead love wealth, honour, or the approval of parents – and that is sin.

I’ve dealt with how the spirituality of Watchman Nee is not biblical in another series of posts (here is one). But in short while while it sounds appealing, Nee’s doctrine of man, doctrine of providence and doctrine of sin are actually wrong. His spirituality has more to do with Eastern Asceticism than it has to do with biblical Christianity. The spiritual man does not bypass reason, he makes the appropriate use of reason.

And the last two essentially say that God can’t be glorified in work – only apart from it. Only when we step away from it (either for a few moments or for many years) to speak about Jesus. Which doesn’t seem to fit with Paul’s assertion in 1 Corinthians 10:31 that God can be glorified in whatever that you do.

So how do we actually glorify God? More about that in our next post… :)

I’ve had several conversations with pastors and church leaders who have had to deal with conflicts in their church. And often they bemoan how dealing with conflict takes up so much of their time, how it  distracts them from real ministry, how it’s so emotionally draining for them.

And it does take up a lot of time. There may be a lot of phone calls to make, a lot of one-on-one sessions to hold, and even lengthy, emotionally-sapping meetings to attend.

However conflicts are not distractions from real ministry. They are in fact opportunities for people to live out godly Christian living and be stretched in their godliness. To learn to do in practice, and not just in theory, things in the Bible.

Because when conflicts arise, suddenly people are being called on to put their theology into gear:

• is unity more important than theology … or not?
• does my culture override the Bible … or not?
• is the preservation of my face more important to me than honouring my Lord … or not?
• is it okay for me to withhold forgiveness and nurse resentments for many years … or not?
• is it okay for me to berate someone else in my anger … or not?

And you can imagine that in the heat of the moment, people caught up in conflict may be tempted to slide the wrong way. Especially if our desire is to sweep the conflict aside quickly and get back to ‘real’ ministry. Without taking the time to consider significant questions like what biblical forgiveness really looks like. whether we are putting culture over the Bible. whether unity really is the highest virtue in Christianity…

And so when conflicts arise, don’t become exasperated and annoyed that it is taking you away from your discipling programme. Because walking people through conflict is itself discipling. Having people deal with conflict well is itself one aspect of godly Christian living. Explaining to people what the Bible says about conflict isitself teaching and applying the Bible… not a distraction from it!

Instead, give the conflict the attention, patience, prayer and theological insight that it deserves. And don’t quickly rush that conflict out the door!